I Ain’t No New Sensation

Well for those of you that don’t know me personally I have been heavy my entire life. A chubby kid turned into a fat teenager. A fat teenager progressed into an obese adult. Struggles with my weight have been a constant battle that I was loosing as time ticked away. I can’t tell you what I weighed at my heaviest, much to my dismay, but I do know the biggest pant size I wore was a 28 and in tops I’ve worn a 4X, eek!

The best decision I made…

A friend of mine had been doing these weight loss challenges, kind of like a mini version of the Biggest Loser. She had been doing the challenges for about 6 months at the time and she’d lost weight successfully. She had been trying to get me to go with her, but over and over I politely thanked her for the offer and passed.

In April 2011, a challenge had just ended and a new one was starting. She asked again with no pressure. I said I’d think about it. The usual response when you know you’re not gonna follow through with something. Sure the idea of loosing weight was appealing, but did I really believe I could do it? That’s the true question. The answer was a resounding no. I’d gotten complacent and would look in the mirror thinking, “well this is as good as it’s gonna get”.

So here we are…the start day of the challenge. I found myself sitting in my truck in the parking lot, debating if I was even gonna go inside to hear about the challenges.

“Should I go in? No, I’m too embarrassed! I’m this fat disgusting person that deserves this life. I’ve gotten this big on my own. This is really all you’ve known. Who are you kidding? You’re not gonna lose any weight!”

All of those self-deprecating/self-destructive thoughts ran through my mind. I really did sit there for quite sometime debating my options. Perhaps the deciding factor was “what the fuck do you have to lose?”

So I walked up to the door and with a deep breath in, I opened it.

My new journey started that day! I went on to participate in 4 challenges total, for entire year! Of those 4 challenges I won 1st place in the weight loss 3 times running!

I started going to the gym regularly. Focused on a fixed daily calorie count and religiously logging my food in an online fitness/food app. I’d taken many steps in this “new Kat” mind-set. I started running local races…and by running I mean walking. Little steps are what a giant leap is made of.

To date I have done countless 5K’s, a 6K and a 10K, and three half marathons, besides my regular workouts. I also climbed Flat Top to the second saddle, a local mountain that is hiked regularly in the summer season! My personal goal for 2012 was to participate in three half marathons. Alas I was only able to do two due to work conflicts. Not accomplishing this personal goal didn’t sit well with me. So it’s moved into this years personal challenges. I WILL complete 3 half’s this year! I have already signed up for two of the three. Now my next goal is to better my performance/time on these races! Currently training to succeed in that too!

Of course fitness is just one half of the puzzle. Food is the other! The devil himself lies on this side of the equation for me. I’ll admit it, I’m a food junkie! Food is something that is constantly on my mind. My biggest problem other than turning to food as a comfort is that I have a huge problem with control…portion control is key.

Personally wise I’m a control freak. I like to have everything under “manageable limitations”! Constantly under scrutiny by myself…and she’s the hardest task master there is. It seems that with food, I gave myself a free pass. It is the one thing I never controlled or wanted to. It was something I just did. Eat…and I like to succeed in all things! So eat I did, and eat and eat and eat! I ate my way to the size I was…to this miserable person hiding inside.

This is something that I will work on each day for the rest of my life!

I get asked a lot about my diet…

How’s the diet coming? Are u sticking with your diet?

Let me make this clear…this is NOT a diet!

This IS a lifestyle change!

Something I will do for the rest of my life.

It’s all the little things that have built up over time that mean the most…they add up to the greater accomplishment!

From getting in my truck and there is space between my stomach and the steering wheel, clothes that are falling off of me, sitting down and seeing not much of a stomach sticking out where as all I used to see was stomach. All these things make me continue moving forward to my goal.

Since that first challenge in 2011 I have lost 89lbs to date!

As I said before I don’t know what I weighed at my heaviest, but I do know that I have lost well over 100lbs.

It’s unbelievable!

Thank you to all my friends and family. Thank you for your encouragement and support. It has meant more to me then you could ever know. I love each and every one of you.

As I continue this thing called life a song plays over and over again…

“I ain’t no new sensation, but I’m better than I ever been!” ~Train

Ramblings of a girl named Kat xo

Below are some pics of my weight loss!

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December 2010 & March 2013

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Collage: Dec 2010, May 2011, July & Aug 2012

 

 

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4 thoughts on “I Ain’t No New Sensation

  1. Shut the front door!!! I’m so flipping proud of you for making the change! You are an amazing woman and a true inspiration to everyone who struggles with something, or anything. Heck, you inspired me. I’m going to sign up for a half marathon or two. You have always been beautiful and always awesome, but now you have even more sparkle in your smile. You are sensational!

    1. Thanks Kiesa!! I love you a lot and miss you even more! Thank you, you have been an inspiration to me too! You’ve lost weight and have always seen the inner beauty in others, despite their outer appearance. I look back at the pics from 2007 and I cringe at how I looked. I hope I get to see you again before another 11 yrs passes us by! And just think how that’ll be!! Butt Crack City & Barbie Backpacks indeed…plus my two beautiful nieces!! Hugs & kisses to you and the girls! I love you! Auntie Kat xo

  2. My Poppet I so get everything that you are saying….I too have walked in these shoes and your strength and heart is awe inspiring Hun! You have an amazing outlook on life and I love reading everything that you write cause it so heartfelt and honest! Congratulation on your success!!! Love you heaps xox

    1. I love you too Mama! Thank you for your caring words. Your support means so much to me. I know you know that, but I’ll continue to say it! This process has been long and will continue on. Always ongoing. I love that people can see and feel the emotions that I put into my writing. It is encouraging! Thank you so much again! xo Kat ur poppet

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